Peter Fallow -- Bizarro World Romenesko!!

If there were ever a time for an arrogant, drunken, lazy, ethically challenged and totally fictitious reporter to comment on the state of journalism, it is now!

Wednesday, May 26, 2004

Abu Ghraib: The porn made them do it!

That seems to be the conclusion drawn by the author of this opinion piece in today's Los Angeles Times.

It strikes me as one of the saner commentaries from "the right" that I've read recently, and I'll tell you why.

My fine collection of spanking magazines has tempted me to visit unspeakable outrages on my assistants: Maid Janet, intern Ricky and my latest hire, Jayson, my shoeshine boy. He's a blogger who says he gained fame as a poet before powerful white racists and Jews brought him low.

(Those bitter experiences may explain why he bristles when I call him "boy." He's also not fond of a bit I picked up from that wonderful gangster movie Goodfellas. When I need a shine, I'll affect my best Brooklyn accent and tell him to "go home and get ya fuckin' shinebox.")

But now the L.A. Times reminds me that my fondness for a violent movie is just more proof that I live in a "culture gone stark raving mad."

But then, that's the way I've always secretly felt about you bloated, besotted Americans. You're all insane. Here you sit, thousands of miles from the rest of the world, a fat , fertile continent all yours to exploit ,and what do you do? Jerk off to "rough sex" videos.

Bloody Yanks. You deserve negative media coverage.

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